There was a time when I thought I’d lost myself for good.
Not because of some huge dramatic moment—but because joy just quietly… stopped showing up.
I didn’t realize it right away. It snuck in between canceled plans and half-finished projects. It lingered in the silence of long, symptom-heavy days and the heaviness of constantly trying to “adjust.” Eventually, I couldn’t remember the last time I felt genuinely excited about something.
If you’ve been there—if you’re there now—you’re not alone. And more importantly, you’re not stuck.
Joy is still possible, even here. But you may need to learn a whole new way of finding it.
In this post, I’m going to share the unconventional, non-toxic ways I slowly brought joy back into my life after illness upended everything. And I’ll show you how to start finding your way back, too—even if you’re not feeling hopeful right now.
But first, let’s talk about where joy really goes when chronic illness takes over.
Disclaimer: While I offer tips for maintaining wellness while dealing with a chronic illness, I’m not a licensed medical physician, psychotherapist, or psychologist, and I’m not offering medical or psychiatric advice.
For my full disclaimer policy, go here.
When Joy Fades Quietly Wiht Chronic Illness
Joy doesn’t always disappear in dramatic, obvious ways. More often, it fades in the background.
It happened gradually for me. My days became all about management—managing pain, managing fatigue, managing expectations. The things I used to love just didn’t fit anymore, and I didn’t know how to replace them. I wasn’t exactly miserable all the time, but I wasn’t really living either.
Just existing.
And the worst part? I thought that was as good as it was going to get.
That belief almost kept me from discovering that there was a way forward. But eventually, something shifted—and when it did, everything started to change.
How to Find Joy With Chronic Illness by Asking
One Simple Question
If you want to know how to find joy with chronic illness, don’t start by trying to get your old life back. Start by asking:
“What still feels like me?”
This might take time. It’s okay if nothing comes to mind immediately. But for me, the turning point wasn’t some grand reinvention. It was rediscovering tiny, overlooked parts of myself—things that sparked the smallest flicker of interest or calm.
A certain kind of music. A texture I liked. Sitting outside and watching the light change.
That flicker was enough to start with. Because joy doesn’t need to be big. It just needs a place to land.
What If You Didn’t Have to Feel Better First?
I used to tell myself I’d try to enjoy things “once I had more energy” or “when the pain wasn’t as bad.” But those perfect conditions rarely came. I spent years waiting for someday.
One of the hardest lessons I had to learn was this:
Joy doesn’t have to wait for a good day.
You can start choosing joy with the symptoms—not after them.
That might mean watching a favorite show while lying in bed, or doing a hobby in 5-minute increments instead of hours. It might mean letting yourself feel proud of something small, like brushing your hair or replying to a message you’ve been avoiding.
You don’t have to “earn” joy. You just have to stop pushing it off.
Creating New Paths to Joy With Chronic Illness
I’ll be honest—some things I loved, I had to let go of. I also had to take a few things off my Bucket List. And the grief I felt about this is real. But I also had to ask myself: What else could bring me fulfillment, even if it looks totally different?
That question led me to unexpected places.
I found comfort in crocheting while resting. I learned to love singing again, in short bursts. I discovered small rituals—watching the birds when I’m outside (or from the window inside on bad days), mindfully making an espresso drink—that felt meaningful.
It wasn’t about replacing what I lost. It was about making room for what still worked.
And in the process, I found joy again in new forms—forms that actually fit my life now.
Prioritizing Joy Starts With Protecting Your Energy
One of the biggest barriers to joy isn’t just symptoms—it’s overcommitment.
I was constantly pushing myself to do more, be more, keep up. But when I started paying attention to how I used my energy, everything shifted.
That meant:
- Saying no without guilt (still hard, still worth it)
- Letting non-essential tasks stay undone
- Building my day around energy peaks—not social pressure
Instead of burning out, I started preserving energy for the things that filled me up.
That’s how to find joy with chronic illness: not by doing everything, but by doing what truly matters to you.
What If You’re Not Sure What Brings You Joy?
That’s okay.
Joy isn’t a checklist. It’s a practice. And sometimes, it’s one you have to relearn slowly, especially after living in survival mode.
Here’s what helped me rebuild:
- Exploration without expectation. I tried things with curiosity, not pressure.
- Tracking tiny moments of joy. A funny meme. A cozy nap. That counts.
- Mindful presence. When I slowed down and noticed the moment—without judgment—I started feeling more connected, even when things were hard.
Joy doesn’t always come in fireworks. Sometimes it arrives like a breeze through an open window. Subtle. Quiet. But unmistakably yours.
There’s Joy Here. Even Now.
If no one else has told you this today, let me:
You deserve to feel joy again. Not later. Not “once you’re better.” Right now. Exactly as you are.
You don’t have to fake positivity or chase a miracle cure to feel fulfilled.
You can build a life that feels like yours again—even if it’s slower, softer, or different than you imagined.
Learning how to find joy with chronic illness isn’t about going back to who you were. It’s about learning to love who you are becoming.
And if you’re not sure where to start?
Download My Free Gift to You
To help you on your journey, I’ve created “10 Empowering Affirmations for Those With Chronic Illness.” These aren’t your typical fluffy affirmations—they’re grounded, compassionate reminders that you can return to when joy feels far away.
This free printable is designed to give you a moment of calm, clarity, and encouragement—whenever you need it most.
Fill out the form below to download your FREE affirmations now.
Your joy isn’t gone—it’s just waiting for you to make a little room for it.